Autumn Pictures

I love Autumn. It's not too cold, the colors on the trees are spectacular, and its just a great season to enjoy with your family.

Jada carving her pumpkin. It was a cat. She gave up after awhile, so I had to finish it.

Jada was a Queen Bee and Gabe was her worker Bee.

I was their "flower".

Ja
Jada posing in front of our pretty maple tree in the front yard...

The funeral singer

Tomorrow I am singing at a funeral. Yeah, I know, funerals are downers, and singing at them is no pleasure either. Luckily, though, I don't even know the person's name that the funeral is for, so I have no emotional ties that might make singing more difficult for me.
Sometimes I feel kinda like the "wedding singer" because it seems like the only time I sing anymore is in church, at a wedding or a funeral. Lately, I have really been aching for some "real" singing. Something more substantial, perhaps in a foreign language, written by somone who died 200 years ago. Or singing with a really good choir, a choir that can read music and are a bunch of nerds, and all they do is talk about music and opera and sing.
Oh well, at least I can dream about it...

Slacker

I've totally been a slacker this week. Maybe it has something to do with my PMSing, and well, that says enough for me. Anyway, a good thing and a push in the right direction is, is that I bought an eliptical machine and it's going to be delivered to my house on Friday. So, now I have no excuse not to exercise.

So here's the stats. Nothing to bravo about. I wonder if I can blame it on water retention???

Beginning Weight 196.4
Today's Weight: 193., weight loss: -0.4 total weight loss:3.4
3 Week 5/6 beginning 10/21/2008
Goal: 10 pounds. minus week 1,2,3&4 loss = 6.6 pounds to GOAL

the cutest little honey bee

Just trying on his Halloween costume... I couldn't resist snapping a few photos.

My Daddy's 65th Birthday Suprise

On October 11th, we through my Dad a suprise birthday party. He deserved it as he has worked so hard all of his life, and I think this the first thing we've ever really done to say "thanks". My oldest brother Scott made a video tribute to my Dad with pics and clips of different events in his life, as well as each one of the family members recalling a special memory or something in his honor. It all turned out wonderful, and everyone had a great time. I took pics with all my siblings and enjoyed being with everyone and having a goodtime.

As part of the video, I sang my Dad's favorite hymns so that he can listen and watch me sing any time he wants. My brother teased me and told me he's going to put it on youtube. I sure hope not, as it was not very good. Well, at least its not good enough for public consumption. Anyway, here are some pictures of me with my family last week.

Here is the birthday boy. 65 years young. He's my hero.

My Day and Gabe.

Jada, Gabe, and Grandpa.

Me and my oldest brother Scott

Next in line in the sibling tree is my brother Kevin (with me, of course)

My sister Danielle, and Gabe, and me.

Heather, my younger sister and me.

My brother Scott, was the photog here. Only a brother would take this pic.

Another of me and Heather, we weren't having a "good" picture night.

The baby of the family, and newly wed, Katie.

My neice Amanda

My nephews Kylan and Skyler

My beautiful mommy and my sorta sister sarah.

Are you serious?

Ever heard the cliche "the scale never lies" well, I was dreading stepping on the wretched thing this morning because admittedly, I "fell off the wagon" last week while visiting family. It was horrible. I will just list for you some of the contraband I inhaled last week. Donuts, sugary cereal, pizza, taco time, fried chicken fingers, french fries, cake and ice cream, mozzarella sticks, sugar cookies, potato salad, sweet and sour meatballs etc etc. So as you can imagine, I was almost thinking about giving myself a "pass" this week on the scale, as there was no hope to have lost any weight. But my curiosity got the better of me, and I decided to do it. Of course, I was thinking, I have to strip down to the G's (even though I normally weigh myself with my pajamas on) and stepped on the scale. I was shocked. the number was way too good for even my low expectations. So I put the PJ's back on and jumped back on the scale. Twice. Just to make sure I was seeing right. It was still a loss. Not much of one, but at least not a gain.

Now, I know that I need to step my game up a bit if I am going to reach my goal, in fact I have to lose over 2 pounds a week from now on. I can do it, but have to concentrate a little more, and not visit any family until after the fact, so I can stay out of temptation.

Here's the synopsis:
Beginning Weight 196.4
Today's Weight: 193.4, weight loss: -0.6
total weight loss: 3
Week 4/6 beginning 10/14/2008
Goal: 10 pounds. minus week 1,2&3 loss = 7.0 pounds to GOAL

family and food

I have been visiting my family for the past couple of days. I love it. I love being with my sisters and mom and driving around and not feeling lost (like I do in Seattle), but it's like when an alcoholic goes to his favorite bar and all his drinking buddies are there and he tries to abstain from having a drink himself. It is so hard. I mean, I revert back to old habits and behavior that I know is not healthy, nor is it conducive to my goals for a better me. I'm like a junkie, and all self-control and will power are thrown out the window as I embrace the gooey cheese filled burrito, or the mammoth size slice of pizza. What happens to me? Why can't I overcome these gorge fests? It's depressing, because I already know that the past two weeks of my "good" behavior will be thwarted when I get on the scale on Tuesday.
But it brings me to my topic. For me, when I am with family I engage in unhealthy eating habits. I know that others out there have similar situations when it comes to family. Maybe it is not food like me, but somehow we always fall in to the "role" we've been assigned in the family, and then we react to it. For me, its eating. Not that I eat because I am emotionally filling a void that has been left open from traumatic experiences, but more so, because everything my family does together centers around food. So, I eat a lot when i am with them.
So, I am kinda feeling a bit frustrated and disappointed in myself, because I know that I am not acting like a person who wants to lose weight, but more of someone who is a food junkie. How do I stop all this insanity. How do I change behaviour that has been instilled for a lifetime? I can't give up my family, nor do I want too... but what do I do? I obviously don't have the`right knowledge or strategies to get me through this time, and it's not even a holiday. If anyone has any answers i would love to hear them... (just a small plea for help)

Results of Week two... Beginning of Week 3

Okay, I will count this week as a success, even though, it was only a little over a half of a pound that I lost. I was a little surprised at first, as I walked almost 3 miles everyday last week, but then, I remembered a few encounters with some sugar cookies and pizza, and decided I should be grateful that I lost anything, and didn't gain it back.

So that's my biggest downfall. My husband would agree, is sweets and pizza. I have a hard time saying "no" to those indulgences. And frighteningly, I am going to visit family this weekend and I'm nervous because I always eat too much when I am with my family. The car ride over will be a challenge too, but I decided to BE PREPARED and am going to take along apples and tangerines that are easy enough to eat and are definitely healthier than my daughters snacks which are Cheetos, goldfish, and mother's cookies.

I've also encountered a potentially difficult hurdle to overcome starting this week, and that has to do with the weather. I tried to exercise outside by walking my son in a stroller, but inside the house, he isn't as easily distracted and is constantly crawling on me or hanging on my legs or crying to be picked up when I work out to exercise videos. Which brings me to a little annoyance that I have discovered. I have been at the mercy of "exercise TV" on demand because my stuff still hasn't arrived from Fiji, and I hate the selection that they have. So... even though I do a video (or as much as I can of it) I feel annoyed and want it to end, because I can't stand the video or the trainer etc.

So it seems like week three I have quite a few hurdles to overcome, I know they aren't impossible, but when I face all of them together, they sure look daunting.

Here's the update:
Beginning Weight 196.4
Today's Weight: 194.0, weight loss: -0.6 total weight loss: 2.4
Week 3/6 Beginning 10/7/2008
Goal: 10 pounds. minus week 1&2 loss = 7.6 pounds to GOAL

The Family Pic

More Pictures

Pictures of my family in Fiji