Sunday, December 21, 2008
Go Away, Snow!
I want the snow to stop right now! I mean it! It is going to totally ruin all my Christmas plans if it keeps on snowing. They'll close down all the mountain passes, and I will never make it to Spokane to have Christmas with my family. To some people, this might not be such a big deal, but because I left every single Christmas present at my mom's house, my daughter will wake up on Christmas with absolutely nothing to open! She'll be so upset, I can imagine it now. So I keep praying the weather will clear up enough so that we can travel in our car to Spokane. I just don't want Jada to feel sad on Christmas. Plus, I really want to spend the holidays with my family since we've been out of the country for the past 3 years. So anyone out there who cares... say a little prayer that I can make it to Spokane with my family!
Friday, December 12, 2008
Christmas Pictures
Have yourself a merry little Christmas
I love Christmas time. I love singing all the songs and listening to all the music. I love at nighttime when you drive about town or the neighborhood you'll see splashes of Christmas lights and decorations in yards. I love that I just found an herbal tea called "Christmas sugar cookie" and I love that every night you can find a Christmas movie or themed show going on. I love that things that are normally taken for granted, such as religion, family, service, goodwill all seem to come out in people and they pay more attentions to what is truly important. I love hearing the jingling of the bells as the salvation army volunteers stand out in the cold weather and raise money for those less fortunate than I. I love making Christmas candies and goodies and giving them out to friends and neighbors.I love watching the snow fall down on a dark winter's night when the stars are out and the world feels hushed and at peace. I love my Savior and what Christmas time really means to me and what profound changes a tiny baby can have on the world.
I think too often at Christmas time we get caught up in some of the festivities and traditions and forget why this holiday is actually called Christmas. What have we done so far to remember Christ and celebrate Christ's birth so far this season? Have you been a little more charitable? Have you done anything to help you feel the Christmas spirit a little more? Have you read the Christmas story from Luke 2? Have you played or sung any Christmas hymns that focus on Christ, and not Santa or his reindeer? What have you done to celebrate Christ? If you can't list more than two things, than I say we need to do more! I have heard people say that they wished that the "feeling" they got at Christmas time would last all year round, but how can it if we don't do anything to incorporate the true meaning of Christmas into our lives or into hearts? I know that I need to do this, probably more than anything, and maybe I should be asking myself, what gift can I give to my Savior this year? Maybe instead of planning a New Year's resolution, I should be gifting away one of my bad habits weaknesses and trying to replace it with something that will bring me closer to Christ this year? I don't know, but maybe if I do this instead of setting some unattainable goal, I'll actually be committed to doing it, not only this year, but for my whole life if necessary.
So anyway, think about it. Think what you can "give" to the Savior instead of what Santa or your family members can give to you, and you might find that you have that "Christmas feeling" still with you in June.
Merry Christmas
I think too often at Christmas time we get caught up in some of the festivities and traditions and forget why this holiday is actually called Christmas. What have we done so far to remember Christ and celebrate Christ's birth so far this season? Have you been a little more charitable? Have you done anything to help you feel the Christmas spirit a little more? Have you read the Christmas story from Luke 2? Have you played or sung any Christmas hymns that focus on Christ, and not Santa or his reindeer? What have you done to celebrate Christ? If you can't list more than two things, than I say we need to do more! I have heard people say that they wished that the "feeling" they got at Christmas time would last all year round, but how can it if we don't do anything to incorporate the true meaning of Christmas into our lives or into hearts? I know that I need to do this, probably more than anything, and maybe I should be asking myself, what gift can I give to my Savior this year? Maybe instead of planning a New Year's resolution, I should be gifting away one of my bad habits weaknesses and trying to replace it with something that will bring me closer to Christ this year? I don't know, but maybe if I do this instead of setting some unattainable goal, I'll actually be committed to doing it, not only this year, but for my whole life if necessary.
So anyway, think about it. Think what you can "give" to the Savior instead of what Santa or your family members can give to you, and you might find that you have that "Christmas feeling" still with you in June.
Merry Christmas
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
I am a blogger slacker
Its been a while that I've sent something out into "bloggerspace" but I thought I would try to get something out there.
So for the first time ever I became one with the crazy masses and waited in lines the day after Thanksgiving, in what is now known as "Black Friday". I actually had a great time hanging out with my sisters and mom. We got pretty much everything that we wanted to get and strategized and had "master lists" for everyone to refer to. We split up, my Mom and sister-in-law took on Walmart, and Heather, Katie and I took on Shopko, Target, and Bath and Body Works. We then took a short reek and had breakfast to get up some more energy and then continued on shopping for another couple hours. I had lots of fun hanging out with my sisters. On a not so related note, it's amazing to me how when I was younger, I didn't really like doing things with my sisters, or we were fighting, or disagreeing about what mom should make for dinner etc etc, but now as adults, it is a relationship I cherish, and it means more to me to get a phone call or an email from my sisters than just about anybody else. Maybe its because we have so much history together, and that I don't have to explain myself or my decisions, or that they instinctively know what I would prefer or that we can make fun of each other for all the silly things we used to do as teenagers. I don't know, but I do know that I love my sisters, and its great to be so close to them again, and be able to do fun things together like shopping or going to a movie or to dinner or whatever.
And its not so easy to make good friends when your older, especially if you move frequently. Or maybe its just me. But I find that i have a hard time relating to some of the woman my age or that I just am not that willing to use up my energy trying to make someone my "best friend". I like having history with a person, knowing where they came from, a little bit about their family and all that. For the most part, I feel like all the woman I know who are my age and that I have only recently met, that the "friendship" that we have is superficial, or based solely on the fact that we have children of similar ages. It might also have to do with the fact that all our conversations center around our children. And, if I found someone that I wanted to actually hang out with on a more social basis, possibly without children, how do you go about that... what do you say? Would you like to go to the movies sometime? It sounds like being 16 again.
Wow... were did all that come from? Don't know why I decided to put that out there, but I'm too lazy to go back and erase any of it, so there it is....
So for the first time ever I became one with the crazy masses and waited in lines the day after Thanksgiving, in what is now known as "Black Friday". I actually had a great time hanging out with my sisters and mom. We got pretty much everything that we wanted to get and strategized and had "master lists" for everyone to refer to. We split up, my Mom and sister-in-law took on Walmart, and Heather, Katie and I took on Shopko, Target, and Bath and Body Works. We then took a short reek and had breakfast to get up some more energy and then continued on shopping for another couple hours. I had lots of fun hanging out with my sisters. On a not so related note, it's amazing to me how when I was younger, I didn't really like doing things with my sisters, or we were fighting, or disagreeing about what mom should make for dinner etc etc, but now as adults, it is a relationship I cherish, and it means more to me to get a phone call or an email from my sisters than just about anybody else. Maybe its because we have so much history together, and that I don't have to explain myself or my decisions, or that they instinctively know what I would prefer or that we can make fun of each other for all the silly things we used to do as teenagers. I don't know, but I do know that I love my sisters, and its great to be so close to them again, and be able to do fun things together like shopping or going to a movie or to dinner or whatever.
And its not so easy to make good friends when your older, especially if you move frequently. Or maybe its just me. But I find that i have a hard time relating to some of the woman my age or that I just am not that willing to use up my energy trying to make someone my "best friend". I like having history with a person, knowing where they came from, a little bit about their family and all that. For the most part, I feel like all the woman I know who are my age and that I have only recently met, that the "friendship" that we have is superficial, or based solely on the fact that we have children of similar ages. It might also have to do with the fact that all our conversations center around our children. And, if I found someone that I wanted to actually hang out with on a more social basis, possibly without children, how do you go about that... what do you say? Would you like to go to the movies sometime? It sounds like being 16 again.
Wow... were did all that come from? Don't know why I decided to put that out there, but I'm too lazy to go back and erase any of it, so there it is....
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Autumn Pictures
I love Autumn. It's not too cold, the colors on the trees are spectacular, and its just a great season to enjoy with your family.
Jada carving her pumpkin. It was a cat. She gave up after awhile, so I had to finish it.
Jada was a Queen Bee and Gabe was her worker Bee.
I was their "flower".
Jada carving her pumpkin. It was a cat. She gave up after awhile, so I had to finish it.
Jada was a Queen Bee and Gabe was her worker Bee.
I was their "flower".
Ja
Jada posing in front of our pretty maple tree in the front yard...
Jada posing in front of our pretty maple tree in the front yard...
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
The funeral singer
Tomorrow I am singing at a funeral. Yeah, I know, funerals are downers, and singing at them is no pleasure either. Luckily, though, I don't even know the person's name that the funeral is for, so I have no emotional ties that might make singing more difficult for me.
Sometimes I feel kinda like the "wedding singer" because it seems like the only time I sing anymore is in church, at a wedding or a funeral. Lately, I have really been aching for some "real" singing. Something more substantial, perhaps in a foreign language, written by somone who died 200 years ago. Or singing with a really good choir, a choir that can read music and are a bunch of nerds, and all they do is talk about music and opera and sing.
Oh well, at least I can dream about it...
Sometimes I feel kinda like the "wedding singer" because it seems like the only time I sing anymore is in church, at a wedding or a funeral. Lately, I have really been aching for some "real" singing. Something more substantial, perhaps in a foreign language, written by somone who died 200 years ago. Or singing with a really good choir, a choir that can read music and are a bunch of nerds, and all they do is talk about music and opera and sing.
Oh well, at least I can dream about it...
Slacker
I've totally been a slacker this week. Maybe it has something to do with my PMSing, and well, that says enough for me. Anyway, a good thing and a push in the right direction is, is that I bought an eliptical machine and it's going to be delivered to my house on Friday. So, now I have no excuse not to exercise.
So here's the stats. Nothing to bravo about. I wonder if I can blame it on water retention???
Beginning Weight 196.4
Today's Weight: 193., weight loss: -0.4 total weight loss:3.4
3 Week 5/6 beginning 10/21/2008
Goal: 10 pounds. minus week 1,2,3&4 loss = 6.6 pounds to GOAL
So here's the stats. Nothing to bravo about. I wonder if I can blame it on water retention???
Beginning Weight 196.4
Today's Weight: 193., weight loss: -0.4 total weight loss:3.4
3 Week 5/6 beginning 10/21/2008
Goal: 10 pounds. minus week 1,2,3&4 loss = 6.6 pounds to GOAL
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
the cutest little honey bee
Just trying on his Halloween costume... I couldn't resist snapping a few photos.
My Daddy's 65th Birthday Suprise
On October 11th, we through my Dad a suprise birthday party. He deserved it as he has worked so hard all of his life, and I think this the first thing we've ever really done to say "thanks". My oldest brother Scott made a video tribute to my Dad with pics and clips of different events in his life, as well as each one of the family members recalling a special memory or something in his honor. It all turned out wonderful, and everyone had a great time. I took pics with all my siblings and enjoyed being with everyone and having a goodtime.
As part of the video, I sang my Dad's favorite hymns so that he can listen and watch me sing any time he wants. My brother teased me and told me he's going to put it on youtube. I sure hope not, as it was not very good. Well, at least its not good enough for public consumption. Anyway, here are some pictures of me with my family last week.
Here is the birthday boy. 65 years young. He's my hero.
My Day and Gabe.
Jada, Gabe, and Grandpa.
Me and my oldest brother Scott
Next in line in the sibling tree is my brother Kevin (with me, of course)
My sister Danielle, and Gabe, and me.
Heather, my younger sister and me.
My brother Scott, was the photog here. Only a brother would take this pic.
Another of me and Heather, we weren't having a "good" picture night.
The baby of the family, and newly wed, Katie.
My neice Amanda
My nephews Kylan and Skyler
My beautiful mommy and my sorta sister sarah.
Are you serious?
Ever heard the cliche "the scale never lies" well, I was dreading stepping on the wretched thing this morning because admittedly, I "fell off the wagon" last week while visiting family. It was horrible. I will just list for you some of the contraband I inhaled last week. Donuts, sugary cereal, pizza, taco time, fried chicken fingers, french fries, cake and ice cream, mozzarella sticks, sugar cookies, potato salad, sweet and sour meatballs etc etc. So as you can imagine, I was almost thinking about giving myself a "pass" this week on the scale, as there was no hope to have lost any weight. But my curiosity got the better of me, and I decided to do it. Of course, I was thinking, I have to strip down to the G's (even though I normally weigh myself with my pajamas on) and stepped on the scale. I was shocked. the number was way too good for even my low expectations. So I put the PJ's back on and jumped back on the scale. Twice. Just to make sure I was seeing right. It was still a loss. Not much of one, but at least not a gain.
Now, I know that I need to step my game up a bit if I am going to reach my goal, in fact I have to lose over 2 pounds a week from now on. I can do it, but have to concentrate a little more, and not visit any family until after the fact, so I can stay out of temptation.
Here's the synopsis:
Beginning Weight 196.4
Today's Weight: 193.4, weight loss: -0.6
total weight loss: 3
Week 4/6 beginning 10/14/2008
Goal: 10 pounds. minus week 1,2&3 loss = 7.0 pounds to GOAL
Now, I know that I need to step my game up a bit if I am going to reach my goal, in fact I have to lose over 2 pounds a week from now on. I can do it, but have to concentrate a little more, and not visit any family until after the fact, so I can stay out of temptation.
Here's the synopsis:
Beginning Weight 196.4
Today's Weight: 193.4, weight loss: -0.6
total weight loss: 3
Week 4/6 beginning 10/14/2008
Goal: 10 pounds. minus week 1,2&3 loss = 7.0 pounds to GOAL
Friday, October 10, 2008
family and food
I have been visiting my family for the past couple of days. I love it. I love being with my sisters and mom and driving around and not feeling lost (like I do in Seattle), but it's like when an alcoholic goes to his favorite bar and all his drinking buddies are there and he tries to abstain from having a drink himself. It is so hard. I mean, I revert back to old habits and behavior that I know is not healthy, nor is it conducive to my goals for a better me. I'm like a junkie, and all self-control and will power are thrown out the window as I embrace the gooey cheese filled burrito, or the mammoth size slice of pizza. What happens to me? Why can't I overcome these gorge fests? It's depressing, because I already know that the past two weeks of my "good" behavior will be thwarted when I get on the scale on Tuesday.
But it brings me to my topic. For me, when I am with family I engage in unhealthy eating habits. I know that others out there have similar situations when it comes to family. Maybe it is not food like me, but somehow we always fall in to the "role" we've been assigned in the family, and then we react to it. For me, its eating. Not that I eat because I am emotionally filling a void that has been left open from traumatic experiences, but more so, because everything my family does together centers around food. So, I eat a lot when i am with them.
So, I am kinda feeling a bit frustrated and disappointed in myself, because I know that I am not acting like a person who wants to lose weight, but more of someone who is a food junkie. How do I stop all this insanity. How do I change behaviour that has been instilled for a lifetime? I can't give up my family, nor do I want too... but what do I do? I obviously don't have the`right knowledge or strategies to get me through this time, and it's not even a holiday. If anyone has any answers i would love to hear them... (just a small plea for help)
But it brings me to my topic. For me, when I am with family I engage in unhealthy eating habits. I know that others out there have similar situations when it comes to family. Maybe it is not food like me, but somehow we always fall in to the "role" we've been assigned in the family, and then we react to it. For me, its eating. Not that I eat because I am emotionally filling a void that has been left open from traumatic experiences, but more so, because everything my family does together centers around food. So, I eat a lot when i am with them.
So, I am kinda feeling a bit frustrated and disappointed in myself, because I know that I am not acting like a person who wants to lose weight, but more of someone who is a food junkie. How do I stop all this insanity. How do I change behaviour that has been instilled for a lifetime? I can't give up my family, nor do I want too... but what do I do? I obviously don't have the`right knowledge or strategies to get me through this time, and it's not even a holiday. If anyone has any answers i would love to hear them... (just a small plea for help)
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Results of Week two... Beginning of Week 3
Okay, I will count this week as a success, even though, it was only a little over a half of a pound that I lost. I was a little surprised at first, as I walked almost 3 miles everyday last week, but then, I remembered a few encounters with some sugar cookies and pizza, and decided I should be grateful that I lost anything, and didn't gain it back.
So that's my biggest downfall. My husband would agree, is sweets and pizza. I have a hard time saying "no" to those indulgences. And frighteningly, I am going to visit family this weekend and I'm nervous because I always eat too much when I am with my family. The car ride over will be a challenge too, but I decided to BE PREPARED and am going to take along apples and tangerines that are easy enough to eat and are definitely healthier than my daughters snacks which are Cheetos, goldfish, and mother's cookies.
I've also encountered a potentially difficult hurdle to overcome starting this week, and that has to do with the weather. I tried to exercise outside by walking my son in a stroller, but inside the house, he isn't as easily distracted and is constantly crawling on me or hanging on my legs or crying to be picked up when I work out to exercise videos. Which brings me to a little annoyance that I have discovered. I have been at the mercy of "exercise TV" on demand because my stuff still hasn't arrived from Fiji, and I hate the selection that they have. So... even though I do a video (or as much as I can of it) I feel annoyed and want it to end, because I can't stand the video or the trainer etc.
So it seems like week three I have quite a few hurdles to overcome, I know they aren't impossible, but when I face all of them together, they sure look daunting.
Here's the update:
Beginning Weight 196.4
Today's Weight: 194.0, weight loss: -0.6 total weight loss: 2.4
Week 3/6 Beginning 10/7/2008
Goal: 10 pounds. minus week 1&2 loss = 7.6 pounds to GOAL
So that's my biggest downfall. My husband would agree, is sweets and pizza. I have a hard time saying "no" to those indulgences. And frighteningly, I am going to visit family this weekend and I'm nervous because I always eat too much when I am with my family. The car ride over will be a challenge too, but I decided to BE PREPARED and am going to take along apples and tangerines that are easy enough to eat and are definitely healthier than my daughters snacks which are Cheetos, goldfish, and mother's cookies.
I've also encountered a potentially difficult hurdle to overcome starting this week, and that has to do with the weather. I tried to exercise outside by walking my son in a stroller, but inside the house, he isn't as easily distracted and is constantly crawling on me or hanging on my legs or crying to be picked up when I work out to exercise videos. Which brings me to a little annoyance that I have discovered. I have been at the mercy of "exercise TV" on demand because my stuff still hasn't arrived from Fiji, and I hate the selection that they have. So... even though I do a video (or as much as I can of it) I feel annoyed and want it to end, because I can't stand the video or the trainer etc.
So it seems like week three I have quite a few hurdles to overcome, I know they aren't impossible, but when I face all of them together, they sure look daunting.
Here's the update:
Beginning Weight 196.4
Today's Weight: 194.0, weight loss: -0.6 total weight loss: 2.4
Week 3/6 Beginning 10/7/2008
Goal: 10 pounds. minus week 1&2 loss = 7.6 pounds to GOAL
Saturday, October 4, 2008
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
New Week.... New Weight...?
Okay, I know all of you must be dying of suspense on whether or not my "obsession" so far has amounted to anything. Happily, I would like to report, that this past week was a successful one with 1.8 lbs lost. Great. Amazing. YEAH!
I found this quaint little park a few blocks from my home that has a walking trail around it of an approx. length of 1/3 of a mile. So yesterday, I walked three miles, and today two, but it was only less, because my son refused to fall asleep in the stroller, so by the 6th time around, he was complaining a little too loudly for me, or anyone in the park, to ignore, so we had to head back home a little earlier.
I think a small goal for me this week will be to consume more water. I don't drink enough, and I want to start drinking at least the minimum recommended amount, which is 64 oz. I believe. So hopefully that will at least make my skin more hydrated and healthier looking, though the downside is that I'll have to use the bathroom a whole lot more, which can be so inconvenient at times.
On another note, I was talking to my Dad on the phone today and he was explaining to me a little bit more about the economic crisis that our country's in, and it really made me think about food storage and being prepared as the Prophets have been telling us for years. So, I don't know if any of you are like me, but I've got nothing in the way of food storage, and not much that is really called "savings" as most of the money is to be used for my husband's education or expenses related to that. Thinking about all this and all these things being somehow tied together is making me anxious. I am putting items on my list to include as a food storage of some sort, probably by buying a 20lb bag of flour and rice and some canned goods I might be able to make into something. It's not much, but I think, I definitely need to start somewhere and start NOW.
But, for all you who are keeping track, here's this weeks weigh-in summary:
I found this quaint little park a few blocks from my home that has a walking trail around it of an approx. length of 1/3 of a mile. So yesterday, I walked three miles, and today two, but it was only less, because my son refused to fall asleep in the stroller, so by the 6th time around, he was complaining a little too loudly for me, or anyone in the park, to ignore, so we had to head back home a little earlier.
I think a small goal for me this week will be to consume more water. I don't drink enough, and I want to start drinking at least the minimum recommended amount, which is 64 oz. I believe. So hopefully that will at least make my skin more hydrated and healthier looking, though the downside is that I'll have to use the bathroom a whole lot more, which can be so inconvenient at times.
On another note, I was talking to my Dad on the phone today and he was explaining to me a little bit more about the economic crisis that our country's in, and it really made me think about food storage and being prepared as the Prophets have been telling us for years. So, I don't know if any of you are like me, but I've got nothing in the way of food storage, and not much that is really called "savings" as most of the money is to be used for my husband's education or expenses related to that. Thinking about all this and all these things being somehow tied together is making me anxious. I am putting items on my list to include as a food storage of some sort, probably by buying a 20lb bag of flour and rice and some canned goods I might be able to make into something. It's not much, but I think, I definitely need to start somewhere and start NOW.
But, for all you who are keeping track, here's this weeks weigh-in summary:
Beginning Weight 196.4
Today's Weight: 194.6, weight loss: -1.8
Week 2/6 Begining 9/30/2008
Goal: 10 pounds. minus week 1 loss = 8.2 pounds to GOAL
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Pres. Uchtdorf's talk and how do I apply it to myself?
I am sure that most of you women out there who read this blog went to the General Relief Society Broadcast last night. As you know, President Uchtdorf spoke on two principles to make us happy. I would like to speak a little about the first one, "create something".
I want to do this really badly, but I haven't quite found my niche in what I find joy in creating. I've tried my hand at scrap booking, and that's okay, but I want to find something that I am really good at, that when I look at the finished product, I feel satisfied.
Most of you might think that music does that for me. Unfortunately, it doesn't. I hear to many imperfections in my voice and "know" too much about all the things that are flawed about it to really find that kind or satisfaction with my own voice. Though, running off that thought, I get alot of satisfaction singing in a choir or ensemble that makes beautiful music, so maybe that's the way to go. Maybe I need to find some people who, like me, like to create beautiful music together. So that's one option.
But, I would like to find out if I have other abilities in creating something that is worthwhile and satisfies me. Any suggestions? What do you all create that gives you this happy, satisfied, complete feeling? How should I get started?
I guess I can also look at "creating" myself a fabulously healthy body, which if you read my previous post, you already know about this goal.
As Pres. Uchtdorf said, the creation doesn't have to be perfect, and it can be as simple as creating laughter in the home, or beautifying a space. I guess the only way to test this all out is to give it a "go" and see if I find just as much happiness in creating something as our Heavenly Father found creating us.
The other aspect of finding peace and happiness that he shared was compassionate service. Actually doing my visiting teaching each month might be a start. What kinds of compassionate service do you do? Maybe getting more involved in my daughters school, or getting to know my neighbors and finding out what their needs are. Or maybe there is a family member who is in need of my service, whether it be babysitting for a few hours, or taking someone to the doctors, or just sitting around and talking and spending some quality time with a family member that seems to be left out. Or maybe its calling the sister that you don't talk to very often (or all of them, for that matter). As you can see, there are lots of things that I can do, but what I need to do, is actual choose one and act on it. I think I'll make it a matter of prayer and see what direction HF wants me to take on all of this.
OH, and P.S. I made a chocolate cake substituting eggs for the eggs substitute stuff, and vegetable oil for applesauce, and you know what? I couldn't taste a difference. Now I just need to find a healthy substitute for frosting... any ideas? In all, I think it wiped off about 80 calories per serving by using the applesauce and egg substitute. 
Gabe is enjoying the chocolate cake too.
Friday, September 26, 2008
Obsessing about... Weight
One thing that always seems to be hovering around in my mind is the "weight" issue. It's constantly there, nagging and eating away at my self confidence. I know that I no longer have the excuse of "I just had a baby" for the reason why I still have all the extra poundage on my person, so I know that its definitely time to take a more active role in trying to get rid of all that weight that I still carry around.
But losing weight is so psychological and emotional for me, as I am sure it is with most people who want to lose more than 5 pounds. For me, the way I look is connected to the way I feel, and being overweight or not makes up the majority of how I feel about the way I look. The skinniest I have ever been in my adult life has been a size 12 and weighing about 160 pounds. That is still considered overweight for my height and age. But at that size, I felt really good, as in, I felt attractive and cute and active and healthy. Right now, I am squeezing in to my size 16, and weigh (deep breath) 196.4 pounds. So I guess the first step to making things right, is admitting that I have some things "wrong" to work on. So to all of you my friends who read this, this is me opening myself up to scrutiny and criticism, in the attempt to inspire myself to do SOMETHING about it. I am no weight guru, and definitely do not have all the answers, but I am going to attempt to journal my progress, or lack there of on this forum.
Today is week 1, Day 4 of my attempt to get rid of my spare tire. Here's the break down of what I've done or thought about so far.
I bought a little notebook that I write down everything I eat. I am hoping that it will make me a little more self-motivated to not eat so much as I will have to write it down later. The next step will be to become more physically active. This is a little more complicated than I first thought. The original plan was to go for walks in the morning after Jada takes off for kindergarten. But somehow, in the ensuing weeks, this has not happened. I don't know if it would be better to try do do exercise tapes at home, or invest in an elliptical machine or something, so that I can put Gabe in his playpen or while he's taking a nap, get in a few minutes of exercise. The other option is getting a gym membership, but that one is pretty much nullified as I would have to pay or find someone to watch my kids while I went, and I most likely wouldn't get my money's worth out of going to the gym. Yesterday, as I attempted to do one of the exercise tape work outs, every few minutes I had to stop because my son was crying or needed my attention for one reason or another, but I did congratulate myself on making an effort, though I didn't make it through half the tape. I was thinking of it as interval training, but I don't really think "interval" in this sense is stopping to pick up your child.
Tonight after dinner, my family and I went for a walk, and I alternately walked and jogged around the school ground until I made a mile. I felt good afterwards, like I had accomplished something, and it was easy to finish the mile, as my husband was playing with the kids at the playground and it allowed me 20 minutes of uninterrupted time to myself.
So Tuesday is my weigh-in day. I'll journal on Tuesdays to keep y'all posted on my progress. I bought a Weight Watchers scale so that I can keep track of even the slightest drop or gain in weight as it is more precise. (Instead of the scale just reading 196, it says 196.4) I suppose I should have a goal, so I have something more tangible to work towards, so my first goal is to lose 10 pounds in 6 weeks. That's about 1.66 pounds a week to lose.
Beginning Weight 196.4
Week 1/6
Goal: 10 pounds.
But losing weight is so psychological and emotional for me, as I am sure it is with most people who want to lose more than 5 pounds. For me, the way I look is connected to the way I feel, and being overweight or not makes up the majority of how I feel about the way I look. The skinniest I have ever been in my adult life has been a size 12 and weighing about 160 pounds. That is still considered overweight for my height and age. But at that size, I felt really good, as in, I felt attractive and cute and active and healthy. Right now, I am squeezing in to my size 16, and weigh (deep breath) 196.4 pounds. So I guess the first step to making things right, is admitting that I have some things "wrong" to work on. So to all of you my friends who read this, this is me opening myself up to scrutiny and criticism, in the attempt to inspire myself to do SOMETHING about it. I am no weight guru, and definitely do not have all the answers, but I am going to attempt to journal my progress, or lack there of on this forum.
Today is week 1, Day 4 of my attempt to get rid of my spare tire. Here's the break down of what I've done or thought about so far.
I bought a little notebook that I write down everything I eat. I am hoping that it will make me a little more self-motivated to not eat so much as I will have to write it down later. The next step will be to become more physically active. This is a little more complicated than I first thought. The original plan was to go for walks in the morning after Jada takes off for kindergarten. But somehow, in the ensuing weeks, this has not happened. I don't know if it would be better to try do do exercise tapes at home, or invest in an elliptical machine or something, so that I can put Gabe in his playpen or while he's taking a nap, get in a few minutes of exercise. The other option is getting a gym membership, but that one is pretty much nullified as I would have to pay or find someone to watch my kids while I went, and I most likely wouldn't get my money's worth out of going to the gym. Yesterday, as I attempted to do one of the exercise tape work outs, every few minutes I had to stop because my son was crying or needed my attention for one reason or another, but I did congratulate myself on making an effort, though I didn't make it through half the tape. I was thinking of it as interval training, but I don't really think "interval" in this sense is stopping to pick up your child.
Tonight after dinner, my family and I went for a walk, and I alternately walked and jogged around the school ground until I made a mile. I felt good afterwards, like I had accomplished something, and it was easy to finish the mile, as my husband was playing with the kids at the playground and it allowed me 20 minutes of uninterrupted time to myself.
So Tuesday is my weigh-in day. I'll journal on Tuesdays to keep y'all posted on my progress. I bought a Weight Watchers scale so that I can keep track of even the slightest drop or gain in weight as it is more precise. (Instead of the scale just reading 196, it says 196.4) I suppose I should have a goal, so I have something more tangible to work towards, so my first goal is to lose 10 pounds in 6 weeks. That's about 1.66 pounds a week to lose.
Beginning Weight 196.4
Week 1/6
Goal: 10 pounds.
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Honey Buckets
Okay. I think all of us know what a Honey Bucket is. Those blue, portable toilets, right? Most of us choose to avoid them as much as possible, and "hold it" if at all possible. Well, sometimes, using them are unavoidable...
The other day, I had to run to Costco to pick up a view items for the home. Of course, I had my two kids along with me, so we got there about lunch time, as I had to wait until Jada returned from kindergarten. After our brief shopping experience, Jada wanted to have some lunch, so we got some pizza and sat down at the picnic tables at Costco. I kept Gabe strapped into the cart, and Jada and I ate quickly ate. As we picked up our plates to toss in the garbage, I looked at Gabe and saw that something yellow had exploded up the back of his pants. Absolutely mortified, I rushed the cart, with Gabe and Jada in tow to the big sign that said "restrooms". When I got there, there was a smaller sign that said that due to the expansion of the store, their were "temporary" bathrooms for the patrons to use. I grabbed Gabe from the cart, holding his body away from me to limit the amount of "yellow" explosion from my person as possible. I literally walked outside into a fenced area, and realized that my only options were a blue honey bucket, or a bigger one, that looked like a small trailer, though it still said "honey bucket" on the side. I thought I might have better luck in the trailer, so I headed that way. Unfortunately, luck did not find me there. There was nothing but 3 stalls to choose from, and no baby changing table anywhere in sight. As I squeezed into one of the stalls, quickly thinking to myself, "How the heck am I going to do this?" I locked the door, threw my bag on the ground, and started stripping Gabe out of his clothes and finding a baby wipe to do some preliminary cleaning. I shut the toilet lid and laid his jacket underneath so I could tell myself that I was somewhat avoiding germs I didn't even want to think were on every surface of that toilet stall. So, I cleaned him up, narrowly avoiding my son rolling off the seat, and having him scream the whole time, because, it just wasn't a pleasant experience for either one of us.
Anyway, the only reason why I am sharing this experience is the fact that I don't think people understand how hard even a simple trip to the grocery store can actually be. Things like this happen to me and other mothers like me all the time. It's a complicated, dirty, and disgusting job at times. I know the typical sterotypes of stay-at-home mom's are that they sit around watching soap operas and reading romance novels in between cooking a meal that they pulled out of the freezer, but I am here to say I don't know any mothers like that. In fact, I can say personally, that changing from a full-time professional to being a full-time mommy, that my duties as a mommy are much more time-consuming, I get no breaks, sometimes, I don't even get to use the bathroom. I work overtime everyday, and at the end of the day, I am ready for my bed, and then, when I am sleeping, I wake up a couple times a night to change a diaper, or make a bottle, or comfort my daughter when she's had a nightmare.
Don't get me wrong, I am not trying to discredit my previous work at my other jobs, but I know that being a full-time parent can be taken for granted and looked down upon as not as important, or difficult or demanding as other jobs, but it is. And because of all those things, it is also the most satisfying and rewarding of any job.
Talking to my husband a few weeks back, he asked me if I was "happy". Meaning, am I happy staying home with the kids. I looked at him, and thought about all that I was feeling and said to him, "I finally feel like I am at peace. I am happier than I have ever been, and I know, that this is what I am supposed to do. There is no where else, or nothing else that I would like to be doing."
Even after the honey bucket incident... I still feel this way.
The other day, I had to run to Costco to pick up a view items for the home. Of course, I had my two kids along with me, so we got there about lunch time, as I had to wait until Jada returned from kindergarten. After our brief shopping experience, Jada wanted to have some lunch, so we got some pizza and sat down at the picnic tables at Costco. I kept Gabe strapped into the cart, and Jada and I ate quickly ate. As we picked up our plates to toss in the garbage, I looked at Gabe and saw that something yellow had exploded up the back of his pants. Absolutely mortified, I rushed the cart, with Gabe and Jada in tow to the big sign that said "restrooms". When I got there, there was a smaller sign that said that due to the expansion of the store, their were "temporary" bathrooms for the patrons to use. I grabbed Gabe from the cart, holding his body away from me to limit the amount of "yellow" explosion from my person as possible. I literally walked outside into a fenced area, and realized that my only options were a blue honey bucket, or a bigger one, that looked like a small trailer, though it still said "honey bucket" on the side. I thought I might have better luck in the trailer, so I headed that way. Unfortunately, luck did not find me there. There was nothing but 3 stalls to choose from, and no baby changing table anywhere in sight. As I squeezed into one of the stalls, quickly thinking to myself, "How the heck am I going to do this?" I locked the door, threw my bag on the ground, and started stripping Gabe out of his clothes and finding a baby wipe to do some preliminary cleaning. I shut the toilet lid and laid his jacket underneath so I could tell myself that I was somewhat avoiding germs I didn't even want to think were on every surface of that toilet stall. So, I cleaned him up, narrowly avoiding my son rolling off the seat, and having him scream the whole time, because, it just wasn't a pleasant experience for either one of us.
Anyway, the only reason why I am sharing this experience is the fact that I don't think people understand how hard even a simple trip to the grocery store can actually be. Things like this happen to me and other mothers like me all the time. It's a complicated, dirty, and disgusting job at times. I know the typical sterotypes of stay-at-home mom's are that they sit around watching soap operas and reading romance novels in between cooking a meal that they pulled out of the freezer, but I am here to say I don't know any mothers like that. In fact, I can say personally, that changing from a full-time professional to being a full-time mommy, that my duties as a mommy are much more time-consuming, I get no breaks, sometimes, I don't even get to use the bathroom. I work overtime everyday, and at the end of the day, I am ready for my bed, and then, when I am sleeping, I wake up a couple times a night to change a diaper, or make a bottle, or comfort my daughter when she's had a nightmare.
Don't get me wrong, I am not trying to discredit my previous work at my other jobs, but I know that being a full-time parent can be taken for granted and looked down upon as not as important, or difficult or demanding as other jobs, but it is. And because of all those things, it is also the most satisfying and rewarding of any job.
Talking to my husband a few weeks back, he asked me if I was "happy". Meaning, am I happy staying home with the kids. I looked at him, and thought about all that I was feeling and said to him, "I finally feel like I am at peace. I am happier than I have ever been, and I know, that this is what I am supposed to do. There is no where else, or nothing else that I would like to be doing."
Even after the honey bucket incident... I still feel this way.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Be all you that you can be.... in the WARD CHOIR
So I am a fan of Ward Choir, no matter what. Having been a ward choir director before, and given the calling to uplift and beautify the sacred Sacrament meeting, there is no excuse good enough for me to miss attending choir practice (well, unless I am out of town or deathly ill, or... dead). So far, in my new ward, the Choir has been rather sparsely put together. About 3 altos, 3 sopranos, and 4 men have been present at choir. I think the numbers make it more of an ensemble, than an actual choir, but no matter. The ward choir director has had to resort to bribes just to get people to show to choir. I think that is humiliating on his part, and shameful on all of the ward choir members who attend just for the free food. But what I have found is that most of the ward members have a list of things that deter them from attending choir. Here's the thing that most people here about ward choir that isn't true.
1. You have to read music (False. You do not have to read music, in fact, ward choir is the perfect place to LEARN this skill)
2. You have to be a _____ (insert one of these adjectives: Good, professional, loud, experienced etc) Singer. (False. Though, it is nice to have a few people who are each of these things, it is also important to have novice, quiet, okay, and yes, even BAD singers in the choir.)
3. You have to know Italian. (False. Though technically alot of the dynamics for music are in fact, Italian, the only person who really needs to know what they all mean is the ward choir director and the accompanist, and they can act as "interpreters" for you.)
4. Ward Choir is boring. (False. It is all about attitude. If you are telling yourself it's going to be boring and a waste of time, then that's what it's going to be for you. If you look at it as a time to learn beautiful church music and get to know more ward members and make friends, you are the time is going to fly by.)
5. You have to sing solos. (False. The choir director will be sensitive to your desires to not do this, and will not make you sing one if you don't want to. )
I could continue making more points about the fallacies of ward choir, but this is really my point: Everyone should be in the ward choir or at least allow and encourage family members to be in it. It should be open to the young and the old, the good and the tone deaf, because in the end, the Lord proclaimed "Make a joyful NOISE". He didn't say "Thou shalt have no other choirs except those who are like unto the Mormon Tabernacle Choir". So don't be in such a rush to get home after church, and drop by your nearest ward choir practice, you'll be glad you did.
1. You have to read music (False. You do not have to read music, in fact, ward choir is the perfect place to LEARN this skill)
2. You have to be a _____ (insert one of these adjectives: Good, professional, loud, experienced etc) Singer. (False. Though, it is nice to have a few people who are each of these things, it is also important to have novice, quiet, okay, and yes, even BAD singers in the choir.)
3. You have to know Italian. (False. Though technically alot of the dynamics for music are in fact, Italian, the only person who really needs to know what they all mean is the ward choir director and the accompanist, and they can act as "interpreters" for you.)
4. Ward Choir is boring. (False. It is all about attitude. If you are telling yourself it's going to be boring and a waste of time, then that's what it's going to be for you. If you look at it as a time to learn beautiful church music and get to know more ward members and make friends, you are the time is going to fly by.)
5. You have to sing solos. (False. The choir director will be sensitive to your desires to not do this, and will not make you sing one if you don't want to. )
I could continue making more points about the fallacies of ward choir, but this is really my point: Everyone should be in the ward choir or at least allow and encourage family members to be in it. It should be open to the young and the old, the good and the tone deaf, because in the end, the Lord proclaimed "Make a joyful NOISE". He didn't say "Thou shalt have no other choirs except those who are like unto the Mormon Tabernacle Choir". So don't be in such a rush to get home after church, and drop by your nearest ward choir practice, you'll be glad you did.
ATTENTION ALL YOU JANE AUSTEN FANS!!!
Okay, so the other day, I was browsing the bookshelves at the library (my new hangout) and picked up the book "The Lost Memoirs of Jane Austen" by Syrie James. Though it is a work of fiction, it really felt as if Miss Jane Austen herself were writing the pages. I truly loved it, just as I love "Pride and Prejudice".
I finished the book this morning when I had a moment to myself, and I am glad I did, because I cried like a big baby. I knew at that moment that the book was really good, because it made me forget that it was only fiction, and I truly wept as if Miss Austen actually went through the events described in the book.
Anyway, I must give Mrs. James, the Author of "Memoirs" kudos, because it was her first novel, and I do believe the Miss Austen herself would find the novel a true gem. I am even willing to give it the very distinguished honor of being placed with my Jane Austen collection on my bookshelves.
So, to all of you who love Jane Austen, find this book, and get lost in the imaginary world of what might have been...
I finished the book this morning when I had a moment to myself, and I am glad I did, because I cried like a big baby. I knew at that moment that the book was really good, because it made me forget that it was only fiction, and I truly wept as if Miss Austen actually went through the events described in the book.
Anyway, I must give Mrs. James, the Author of "Memoirs" kudos, because it was her first novel, and I do believe the Miss Austen herself would find the novel a true gem. I am even willing to give it the very distinguished honor of being placed with my Jane Austen collection on my bookshelves.
So, to all of you who love Jane Austen, find this book, and get lost in the imaginary world of what might have been...
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Grocery Shopping Fun
I'm sure many of you have been grocery shopping with your children. It's oh-so enjoyable. There's the constant nagging for junk food, or the "This is taking too long, when are we going home" complaining, or the tantrums and crying that usually accompany my grocery shopping experience at some point in time. It even gets worse when you make it a grocery shopping extravaganza and plan to go to 4 or more grocery stores in one day. That is what I spent my whole day doing. Add your husband as the chauffeur, and they day just becomes one of domestic bliss.
I know that the sales are great, especially when you walk away from a store and save 50% on your final purchase (I usually achieve this at Albertson's) It's so great. But sometimes I wonder if the 50% savings is worth a little bit of my sanity being stripped away from me.
I had a dream last night, that I walked into the grocery store, I was all by myself, and it must have been really early in the morning or really late in the evening, as I was the only customer in the store. It was 5 star service, with everyone asking me as I turned into each aisle, "Is there anything I can help you find, ma'am?" It was fabulous. I actually walked through the store at a leisurely pace, reading the backs of labels to make "healthier" choices for my family. The store clerks smiled and I had a sparkle in my eye as I enjoyed the service and attention that I don't normally receive during my "reality" shopping experiences.
Now that I come to think of this, maybe this dream was more a revelation, and I will plan all my shopping experiences either early in the morning before my family wakes, or late at night after I have put them in bed. That might be the only way for me to actually enjoy the fact that I spent $153.00, but saved $130.oo. But even if my solitary shopping wish doesn't come true, let's face it, I'll probably go through the same experience next month for such great savings.
I know that the sales are great, especially when you walk away from a store and save 50% on your final purchase (I usually achieve this at Albertson's) It's so great. But sometimes I wonder if the 50% savings is worth a little bit of my sanity being stripped away from me.
I had a dream last night, that I walked into the grocery store, I was all by myself, and it must have been really early in the morning or really late in the evening, as I was the only customer in the store. It was 5 star service, with everyone asking me as I turned into each aisle, "Is there anything I can help you find, ma'am?" It was fabulous. I actually walked through the store at a leisurely pace, reading the backs of labels to make "healthier" choices for my family. The store clerks smiled and I had a sparkle in my eye as I enjoyed the service and attention that I don't normally receive during my "reality" shopping experiences.
Now that I come to think of this, maybe this dream was more a revelation, and I will plan all my shopping experiences either early in the morning before my family wakes, or late at night after I have put them in bed. That might be the only way for me to actually enjoy the fact that I spent $153.00, but saved $130.oo. But even if my solitary shopping wish doesn't come true, let's face it, I'll probably go through the same experience next month for such great savings.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
On-line at the library
I gotta make this quick, as my timer keeps ticking to let me know just how much of an hour I have to write this blog. It's stressful having a time limit on my computer usage ( I only get 2 hours a day). But what's really stressful is trying to use the computer when your 9 month old and 5 and-a-half year old are accompanying you. Normally, my timing is a little better, but today is absolutely the worst! Gabriel refused to fall asleep on the way over, and he has continued to try to get every patron of the library to give us the "evil eye". You know, the "why is that mother here in a library with a baby? UGH, can't she just leave?! She's interrupting my thoughts as I try to find out what's the latest with Britany Spears!" He's also throwing his Binky, spitting his cheerios out and refusing a bottle. Just at that moment, a librarian approaches me, and I had this sinking feeling he was going to ask us to leave, but to my surprise he said, " Would you like to use a laptop? It will probably be easier to manoeuvre with a baby." With a grateful sigh, I said "YES". So now, I am sitting on a couch in the children's section, feeling somewhat better even though my kids are continuing to make noise and even pull some books off the shelves, but in THAT section, it seems to be okay, and somewhat expected.
Since we moved to Shoreline, the only Internet access I have is at my local library. I walk there almost everyday when Jada returns from Kindergarten. It's a great library. I remember how much I used to love the library when I was a kid, and back then, it didn't have any computers. In fact, to find a book, you still had to use a card catalog. So, when I write on my blog, it's most likely going to be from the library.
Now that I have had the above experience, at least now I know to ask for a lap top computer when I first enter the doors, and save myself the embarrassment of 50 different pairs of eyes willing me and my "attachments" to burst into flames.
Since we moved to Shoreline, the only Internet access I have is at my local library. I walk there almost everyday when Jada returns from Kindergarten. It's a great library. I remember how much I used to love the library when I was a kid, and back then, it didn't have any computers. In fact, to find a book, you still had to use a card catalog. So, when I write on my blog, it's most likely going to be from the library.
Now that I have had the above experience, at least now I know to ask for a lap top computer when I first enter the doors, and save myself the embarrassment of 50 different pairs of eyes willing me and my "attachments" to burst into flames.
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
My Letter to Stephenie Meyer
This letter has been brewing in my mind for the last week, and since Stephenie doesn't read fanmail anymore, I decided to publish it here. Who knows, maybe she'll read it someday.....
Dear Ms. Meyer,
I don't usually do this. In fact, I have never done this before, but somehow I feel compelled to write you a letter.
I came across you in a very intersting way. When I was living in Fiji last year, I was checking my friend's myspace site when I noticed her headline read "Where's my Edward Cullen?". Being intrigued, I read that he was a character in you book Twilight. Being an avid reader myself, I decided to go to your website and get the scoop on why my friend would have that strange headline. There I found information on you series "Twilight". As I read, I saw that there was a PDF file for the first chapter of "Midnight Sun". That was my first taste of the wonderful fantasy world that you created with Bella and Edward. From that moment, I couldn't wait to get a hold of your series and read it.
Now, let me get to the point. And it's not to beg you to finish "Midnight Sun" but to say how sorry I am about how your rights were violated like that with it's illegal publication on the internet. I really don't even have words to express how truly sorry I feel about the whole thing.
Finally, I just wanted to say "thank you". I haven't enjoyed a book or a series as much as Twilight, ever. You even inspired me to read "Wuthering Heights" and that is a great accomplishment, because I loathe the Bronte sisters ( I am more of a Jane Austen girl). You have definitely grabbed my attention, and have earned a permanent place on my bookshelves.
Sincerely,
Katrina
Dear Ms. Meyer,
I don't usually do this. In fact, I have never done this before, but somehow I feel compelled to write you a letter.
I came across you in a very intersting way. When I was living in Fiji last year, I was checking my friend's myspace site when I noticed her headline read "Where's my Edward Cullen?". Being intrigued, I read that he was a character in you book Twilight. Being an avid reader myself, I decided to go to your website and get the scoop on why my friend would have that strange headline. There I found information on you series "Twilight". As I read, I saw that there was a PDF file for the first chapter of "Midnight Sun". That was my first taste of the wonderful fantasy world that you created with Bella and Edward. From that moment, I couldn't wait to get a hold of your series and read it.
Now, let me get to the point. And it's not to beg you to finish "Midnight Sun" but to say how sorry I am about how your rights were violated like that with it's illegal publication on the internet. I really don't even have words to express how truly sorry I feel about the whole thing.
Finally, I just wanted to say "thank you". I haven't enjoyed a book or a series as much as Twilight, ever. You even inspired me to read "Wuthering Heights" and that is a great accomplishment, because I loathe the Bronte sisters ( I am more of a Jane Austen girl). You have definitely grabbed my attention, and have earned a permanent place on my bookshelves.
Sincerely,
Katrina
Brand New Day
Okay, I have succumbed to the temptation to add my thoughts to the world wide web and let them float around in cyber-space by creating my own personal blog. Not that anyone will read it, but here's a fair warning: it's probably not going to be any good. So don't get your hopes up, I probably will not be diverting your attention for too long, though it will be therapeutic for me, I am sure.
I feel like I need some sort of sign-off, like the prime time news anchors do at the end of their shows... the hardest part of writing a journal or some personal thoughts down for me, is how the hades do I say "I'm done" without it feeling so abrupt? Anyone have any ideas?
Yours,
Katrina
I feel like I need some sort of sign-off, like the prime time news anchors do at the end of their shows... the hardest part of writing a journal or some personal thoughts down for me, is how the hades do I say "I'm done" without it feeling so abrupt? Anyone have any ideas?
Yours,
Katrina
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